To make up for lost time and self-obsession, a window into my soul

I haven't written here for a while because I'm having trouble believing that these are my thoughts. I think I am much more dramatic than I think. Having a lot of time to myself has turned me into a bit more of an obsessive than I used to be, if that were even possible. Yet, I find it difficult to do the most simple things. I guess it doesn't matter how busy or bored I am, I still don't want to do the dishes. And I will still aimlessly surf the web looking for instant entertainment. But, somewhere in this past month and a half of living in an entirely new place, I've found a sort of quiet. I've been able to stop and realize my thoughts, and if they are negative, which they tend to be, I can say, "Just stop thinking that." It usually goes away and then comes back, and I have to say it again, but, it's progress... I think that my focus should be to continue saying the same thing. To be consistent, which is something that I have absolutely never been. It just occurred to me that I am writing an awful lot about myself, which is not what I intended as a blogger...oh well. I read somewhere that to be an expert at anything, you have to practice for 10,000 hours. That would be....wait....five and a half years if you practiced 5 hours a day. Practicing whatever you like, that is. I can usually do something for up to an hour a few times a week. I think that this is the dividing line between people who achieve greatness and people who are intelligent and amazing and have a thousand and one interests, but just can't decide. In some bygone era, it used to be enough just to have a family and have enough food to feed that family. Maybe that was before the internet. It was definitely before extreme wealth, and most likely before motion pictures...Had to be, because now, we are in search of instant entertainment, movie stars or celebrities that we compare ourselves to, and a sense of achievement to outdo any achievement already achieved and written about and praised. We even want to be one that praises achievements if we can't achieve our own. The only thing I may ever truly believe is that less is more. The less we have, the more we appreciate. The less we eat, the healthier we become. The less we connect to technology, the more connected to nature, the less we think negative thoughts, the happier we become, and most importantly, the less we consume, the more there is for people who have lived with less than we could ever live with. Sometimes, it seems that everything we know is false and everything we see really is just an illusion.